Well. The amazing week passed and I have floundered into a fog of inertia and sadness. Despite this, I did my best with what was on the agenda. Darling and I got our walks in in the morning and it helped; yoga practice was smattered into the nap mix and I even managed the gym a couple times, but I’ve felt rather lacklustre of late. There have been bursts of happiness and optimism, we’re still laughing in our house (how can you not with turd bird?) but truthfully, things are just kind of meh.
I’m not sure if it’s the weather or an underlying shift, more than likely, just a cloudy period mood-wise; maybe the reality of mom’s departure has sunk in. I’m trying to be patient with the funk, not wish it away even though I miss my sprightly side, but rather observe and allow.
I think it’s natural to desire the happy state, we just need to be mindful of where an authentic buoyant feeling comes from. I’ve learned, over time, that a trip to the mall doesn’t make the blech-y feeling go away (well mostly). These moods are a natural part of life’s ebb and flow.
I wish I could write from a place of being on the upswing, but no. In the name of honesty I’m being real about what’s happening, without, I hope, dragging you down along with me! I go through the motions, with the odd inflection of inspiration and lightness. I take each day as a huge victory because I am still doing what needs to get done; still connecting and seeing wonderfulness around me. I’ll get to the other side of this, any day now. I have faith.
I’ve had ample opportunity and little nudges reminding me of how friggin good I really do have it. Intellectually I understand. Emotionally and psychologically, I am stuck in a place that is not doing me any favours. But if I dwell on the slumpy grumps too much I then get mad at myself for wasting time in grouchyland, which then invites the whole scenario to reside longer. So I just keep trying to release, accept, release. I’m in the middle of it.
While I’m down here, shout out and great big love to the girl, because what can make your heart open more than the unfettered energy of a glorious young’n? And even bigger smooch to my man for his patience and goofiness while he waits for my sunny self to return.
So, in the name of our yoga practice, how can we work with these “down” days? If there’s one thing I can’t emphasise enough it’s the importance of moving your body. I know it feels like the last thing you want to do. It was most definitely the last thing I wanted to do Saturday morning; the grey skies were telling me to take it easy and have a curl up on the couch with a cup of coffee and the newspaper while dragon darling napped. Despite the urge I knew if I got my butt out the door and went to yoga class I would be so much better for it. And I was.
Even though I’m in a bit of a blue phase it’s given plenty of inspiration for this Tuesday’s class. We’ll be working with some flow focused on uplifting spirit and opening our hearts before settling into a sweet restorative practice to nurture the soul and finish up with a heart healing meditation. I look forward to seeing you all there and hope you walk out the door with some tools for your own yucky days.
For those of you who catch up on the blog, what’s your go-to when your mood takes a nose-dive? Do share your wisdom so we are all inspired to accept but proactively manage the blahs.